A spoiler-free review of The Dark Knight Rises, how old is Alfred, a lesser IMAX, the problem with Baskin Robbins inside of Dunkin' Donuts, peeing during a movie, novelty home signs, a preview of The Complete Guide to Everything: After Dark with Algernon, Tim orders a breakfast wrap and learns that he's an old man, and a long, in-depth dissection of the New York Times' latest style piece about Williamsburg.